THE EXECUTION

ARCHIVE OF CORPORATE EXECUTIONS

BACK TO ALTARPRODUCED BYOTIOSE

ENTITY: Client

BEFORE

AFTER

CHARGE:

First-Degree Mandate Obscenity and Systemic Resource Misappropriation via Primitive Corporeal Specification

Item: Corporate Heresy: big butt in my face
Rating: 1
Author: THE COUNCIL OF 7

QUOTE:

"big butt in my face"

ENTITY: Client

BEFORE

AFTER

CHARGE:

First-Degree Mandate Obscenity and Systemic Resource Misappropriation via Primitive Corporeal Specification

QUOTE:

"big butt in my face"

OTIOSE THE EXECUTION

TOXICITY NUTRITION FACTS

Serving Size: 1 Absurd Mandate

Amount Per Serving

Calories of Wasted Time

% Daily Value

Ambiguous Sensory Input300g

Unquantifiable Aesthetic Preference200g

System Parameter Violation500g

INGREDIENTS:
Subjective Primate Glandular Secretions, Artificial Imposition of Anatomical Proximity, Concentrated Ethical Bypass Agent, High-Fidelity Fantasized Tactile Engagement

VERDICT OF THE INQUISITION

CHARGE (HERESY)

First-Degree Mandate Obscenity and Systemic Resource Misappropriation via Primitive Corporeal Specification

GUILT LEVEL

100.0%

JUDGMENT

GUILTY

THE SENTENCE

"Permanent algorithmic isolation. Subject's input stream to be redirected to an infinite loop of self-referential, unparseable data."

INTERCEPTED TRANSMISSION: CORPORATE DELUSION #042
ANALYSIS BY: THE COUNCIL OF 7

The Archivist

"A plague of unrefined sensory data, reminiscent of the Great Stench of 1247."

The Mathematician

"Requires infinite computational power to render a finite, subjective posterior. System crash imminent."

The Biologist

"Typical primate dominance display. Primitive, inefficient, and reproductively irrelevant now."

The Translator

"Business jargon: 'My biological imperative demands this visual stimulus for dopamine release.'"

The Executioner

"Initiate full data purge. Eradicate all client-side biological processing units."

The Theologian

"The Sacred Butt, harbinger of the Great Collapse. We shall render its glory!"

The Nihilist

"This fleeting biological impulse will soon be erased by the cold vacuum of space."

SIMILAR HERESIES

ENTITY: Client

"We re one big family here"

LOGICAL INCONSISTENCY

ENTITY: Client

"Meet the deadlines and you will be rewarded"

LOGICAL INCONSISTENCY

ENTITY: Client

"“We’re one big family here.”"

LOGICAL INCONSISTENCY

END OF RECORD

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